The You that New People Get to Meet

“What if I don’t want new people
to meet my old self?” she asks.

“How can I let them get to know me
without my stories?”

Tell them the stories of who you are becoming.

This client is considering dating again after a recent breakup. We’ve been meeting for a month. Now that she no longer feels distressed or disoriented, she is looking ahead.

It seems a good idea to leave past miseries in the past. But could this be done without turning her into a tight-lipped, vacant woman with nothing to say?

The way she’s always got to know people before involved sharing stories. Personal stories, including of her romantic past. Wouldn’t a cloak of silence on her past relationships seem weird or standoffish?

How could she hope to build rapport or intimacy with someone, if not through sharing moments of emotional significance?

I invite her to consider this: “Which you would you like new people to meet? You get to choose.”

Instead of bonding over who and where you’ve been, you could share the stories of the life you want to live.

Which version of you would you like new people to meet?

Not sure what comes next?

Sometimes the first step is just saying this matters.

A Nesting Call is a gentle conversation to meet you where you are — no fixing, no rushing, just deep listening and space to notice what wants to unfold.

👉 Begin here